What I did on my Summer Vacation

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HAHAHAHAHA. It's funny 'cause it's true! Having somehow acquired the plague on my vacation (which later turned out to be an upper-respiratory infection), there weren't a lot of very physical activities to which I availed myself. I was perfectly content reading in pretty much every location at the resort. And the portability of my book collection is only aided by my recent acquisition of a Kindle. So it was not uncommon to find me nearby to various bodies of water with Kindle in hand and a far-away look in my eye, and a glass of orange juice someplace close.

My best guess is that if you're going to be miserably sick anywhere, it's best to do it someplace tropical where it's not impeding your work or anything. On the other hand, who wants to be sick on vacation?

Just my Luck

Well, not EVERY vacation can be a winner, right? I'm just the kind of person who waits 3 years to take a vacation, only to have it completely buggered by what has turned out to be an upper respiratory infection. What can I say, I'm badass like that.

Keep an eye on this space as my vacation adventures unfold.

They call her ol' one-shoe

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True Story. Just yesterday, I DID, in fact get my shoe wedged in the seam between the door and the step of the work shuttle that brings us back to our cars. I was already 3/4 of the way out of the van and managed to just barely avoid falling flat on my face. That still left me on my knees in the middle of the parking lot with only one shoe, though.

It would have been a lot more embarrassing if I hadn't personally found it so completely hilarious. All that time spent imagining that I could exit the van with the grace and form of an expert gymnast . . . What a waste!

Can you hear me now?!?

You think your roommate is loud? I beg your pardon. Have you ever had a European roommate during soccer season? We have cable tv for the sole purpose of being able to catch the matches between Italy and ... well, whoever is Italy's main rival in soccer. I don't profess to know much of sports, and luckily, I don't have to.

Because for the most part, my roomie keeps to himself, and I stay in my room reading cheesy romance novels. This is for the best.

You've got mailing address!

Ugh. So many comics to catch up on.

I'm touched by the number of you who read the last comic and sent me a message to tell me your own personal stories of apartment-hunting/craigslist horrors. Luckily, my workplace has a nice distribution list for all manner of outside-purposes. So I fired up an email and pretty much spammed my whole company.

And within a matter of minutes, I'd gotten about 6 possible candidates for hassle-free roommates who had already had a background check run on them. Convenient!

Roommate Rumble

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So, a job in Connecticut must beget an apartment in Connecticut, right? 'Cause there's no way in hell I was going to drive to and from Jersey every night. Wasn't going to happen. So where does one who is broke, and relatively friendless find housing on the cheap?

Craigslist, of course! Except that the results of any given search on Craigslist varies greatly. I do not think the majority of people in the world are crazy, but I think it's safe to say that a solid percentage of the folks posting on Craigslist might just be certifiably insane. If they weren't insisting that I could only have a single visitor per month, then they had overzealous dogs, or were smokers, or just wanted too much money. And if none of these things applied, then it was in Bridgeport where there is apparently a magical zone where people will not rent to tiny white girls out of fear of what might happen to them. Curses!

The Interview

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The interview process at this company is hardcore. They’ve been looking for someone to run executive support for MONTHS, but until someone can run the gamut of all 4 interviews successfully, every candidate thus far has been turned away.

But! My interview was so much easier (probably because I’m a consultant). I was in and out in a matter of minutes. And considering I’d driven all the way to Connecticut for it (and in rush-hour traffic no less, right through NYC), it was almost disappointingly simple. Not that I’m complaining. Employment is damn good. It’s just that I’d just spent two and a half hours in a car chanting my new mantra: “Truth! Honesty! Openness! Truth, Honesty, Openness!” which also happens to be the mantra at the company. Have you ever gone to an interview with the sole objective of telling the truth and being completely honest? It’s a hell of a mind game, let me tell you.